Monday, November 4, 2019

When I was a kid I was quite a rascal! Is anyone surprised here? I loved the mysteries of the natural world and was curious about everything. 

Each year at Christmas time, my mother carefully wrapped gifts every night after my sisters and I went to bed. During our Christmas break from school, I learned the careful and slow art of unwrapping each of my gifts, looking them over and carefully rewrapping them to look untouched. I carefully lined up the paper for the correct creases and matched the re-taping process, then retying the ribbon just so. It gave me a great satisfaction in knowing what was under the tree for me.
Looking back,I realize I was trying to control my responses in advance for Christmas Day. I didn't want any disappointing surprises for the big day. If I didn't get a "good" gift, I would be able to act delighted with it so as not to be rude.

I've always liked to be in control of my environment and circumstances when possible. I am a planner by nature. I don't always get things right but I do try to plan for circumstances. I'm not a free thinker, depending on the whim of others. I tend to be an analytical thinker, which is odd for an artist.
I tend to want to do things for myself and not have to depend on others. That is not good when you're on a team. I don't play well in the sand box. Forcing myself to do so is probably good for me for short periods, but I feel sorry for those who have to tolerate me.

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